Too Many Medeas

[heget]

 Okay wait, yes I want this really bad, the AU fic where Selyse Baratheon nee Florent decides after she discovers her new brother-in-law the king fucking her cousin in the marriage bed during her wedding, that he needs to die. Forget bitterness. Embrace regicide. That her dutiful new husband so clearly would be a better king, and she has that same cunning ambitious craftiness of Olenna Tyrell nee Redwyne and Margaery. Selyse is getting her revenge on Robert and making Stannis king.

But Stannis is canon Stannis, would be ever so proper and mindful of his rights and responsibilities and duties, he would not plot treason against his lawful king, no matter how much he resents his brother. So Selyse will have to plot behind her husband’s back. She has a king to poison unobtrusively, a nephew and a lot of Lannisters to remove, so she needs more than just the normal channels of power. Here's the real reason she invites a shadow-binder of R'hllor to Dragonstone. Stannis’s most trusted friend is a former smuggler? She says to herself, "I can work with this, need the black market and criminal underworld ties - just need to be careful to work around his personal loyalty to hubby" (Later scene: “Davos, don’t be so squeamish. Look, it’s for Stannis’s own good, even if he’d never admit it, so don’t tell him. Now help me hide this body and get me Saan.”)

Bonus points if her murder plots are constantly foiled because of Cersei’s own devious plots against her husband, neither lady aware they have (part of) the same goal in mind.

#(of wedding nights ruined by King Bob Selyse can match Cersei)#surely the fic exists?#barely have to tweak canon#can you just imagine a world where davos and selyse are allies#with bonus melisandre#all working before the canon books to kick-start the plot#cercei's rival queen here is not younger or more beautiful alas

Okay, the third great thing about this AU is where Selyse and Cersei try to out plot each other in murdering Robert (Medea versus Lady Macbeth!), screaming in their King’s Landing bowers, ‘why is it so difficult to poison a man!’ - and standing behind them is Lysa, who sniffs and mutters, “Amatuers.”